Creating Personal Ritual for Healing
Personal ritual is a set of intentional actions that we create in an effort to be more present and conscious. It can help you to shift or focus your energy in a meaningful and purposeful way. With personal ritual we create an opportunities for remembering with mindfulness.
Perhaps you are feeling enormous waves of deep feeling that are difficult to manage. You are struggling with wanting to run or hide and creating ritual can help you stay with the feelings in a gentle way. Perhaps you are finding that your busyness in life is keeping you from remembering to honor your grief. Ritual can help you mindfully remember to remember. Perhaps there is a significant anniversary date approaching and you are fearful of how you will get through it. Purposefully creating a ritual can make getting through the anticipated time gentler and more meaningful.
In creating ritual it is important to create a safe and sacred space. This means that you consciously choose a location where you can feel grounded, centered or supported. We also set aside time in a special way. It can be a moment or many moments , but it is time set aside for the purpose of paying attention . Next , you set an intention. What do you want and need at this particular time, What do you want to shift, What do you want to remember? An intention can be like a personal prayer. As an example: “I want to honor my loved one everyday in some way” Then you need to consider if there are objects or actions that will help you to set your intention. You may chose to set up an alter with some of your favorite and most meaningful objects.
I would like to share with you a personal ritual that I have created to honor my beloved mother who died this year. I created a space in my bedroom where I feel very safe and I am sure to be at the beginning and the end of each day. I created a kind of alter by gathering special pictures and objects that bring me strength and also remind me of the strengths of my mother. I chose to sit at this alter every morning, just for a short time and I will do this for 92 days, this would be one day for each day of her life.
My intention is to purposely focus on my mother and my grief feelings each day, so as to deeply honor and respect her and myself. I found a light that had been hers since childhood and she had lit this lamp each anniversary of the significant deaths in her own life . So, I light this lamp at the beginning of each ritual session and leave it lit throughout the day. Then I read a poem that I had found during her dying and had read at her grave when she was buried. I then meditate about her, thinking of her qualities and write down one each day. I have a special rattle which I shake following my special remembrance ritual.
I feel different every day that I perform this ritual, some days it brings up many feelings, some days I feel strong, other days I feel vulnerable. But always, when I think of what I have chosen to do, I feel connected to myself and to my dear mother in a very deep and personal way.
Rituals can be created anywhere at any time, They can be planned or spontaneous. It takes only your intention, your focus and your commitment to be present.